Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Uncertanty

I hate uncertainty. I'm one of those people that like to live by a plan. I want a plan for everything. My husband likes to just take things as we go. Neither of us is wrong or right. There's a time for each way to be the approach to things. Sometimes my way bugs him, and sometimes I find it hard to be patient for his way.


I just wish we had a better plan right now.


We've received new information that makes it most certain that my husband's company may close it's doors soon... sorry that's so vague. That's all I can say for now.


I've been spending some time reading a book of ancestor's biographies. It's always been a fascination of mine, ever since I was a little girl, to hear about my ancestors and their lives. I get that from my father who faithfully shared these stories with us when we were children. It was such a blessing and inspiration to know the people I have descended from.


I find their stories a bit more valuable these days. Especially in more recent times, with our country in a recession and troubling times ahead. I don't foresee anything Obama doing will fix this problem and I am very concerned that his ideas will only worsen the disease that our country is ailing from.


But I look around my home. I look at the objects that we've collected over time. The clutter. The extra. The luxuries and un-necessities. My ancestors who gave everything they had, crossed oceans and plains to join the Saints in Utah and those that lived through the great depression, never had so many things as I have today. My grandmother, married in the early years of the depression, didn't have running water in her kitchen until after being married for a couple of years. She wrote about finding a wash board, which was hard to come by at the time, and how excited she was to have found it.


I may go through some hard times in the coming years, but they will most likely never be anything like the generations before us have gone through. As I am sure they could never imagine the things that I and my children have to face each day, in this world.


It's just interesting to look back. And although it may not be the same, it seems very familiar. I hope that I am made of the same stuff as they were, and I hope that their stories they've left behind for me will help me through whatever things I have to go through in my life, be it now, or fifty years from now.

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