I used to have a friend, we were pretty good friends for a while, it was an online thing. We had a lot of laughs and good times together. Then a lot of things happened that made me distance myself from her. She would play what I consider to be "head games" with people. Suddenly people would be locked out of her blog, or she'd delete her blog with no warning. Or she'd watch her visitor counter and call people out who were visiting and not leaving comments. She couldn't stand the thought of anyone not liking her... "how is it possible that anyone could have issues with little sweet me?" She would be posessive of certain friends (ie. me), not allowing room for other friends in that friend's life. She would push me away, hide online, not be around to talk, but then blame me for the distance between us.
I finally had to walk away. I can't have friends like that. I need friends who don't play head games. Who always welcome you in their life and their blog, sweetly and gently. Who don't shove you away and then get mad when you leave. I've found a few good friends like that, and I'll keep them.
Once, she'd asked me what had happened to me, to our friendship. I didn't have the heart to tell her. How do you find the words to say that? I see someone else did recently, aparently they were frustrated by the same things I was (I didn't see how they told her, or if it was put nicely or meanly, I only saw her reaction) and boy did they get a very public reaming from her on her blog. She removed it later. I don't know if she felt embarassed by chewing them out so publicly, or if she decided that she was done being mad. I was a little shocked at the angry lashing.
The old friend has found other friends who put up with her "quirky ways" and love her anyway. I'm glad for that. Everyone needs friends. Just sometimes it doesn't work out the way we'd like it to. I'd like all of mine to be fatter than me, but so far I'm the fat girl in the bunch.