Saturday, February 28, 2009

Friend Wanted: Must be loyal, stable, and fat

I used to have a friend, we were pretty good friends for a while, it was an online thing. We had a lot of laughs and good times together. Then a lot of things happened that made me distance myself from her. She would play what I consider to be "head games" with people. Suddenly people would be locked out of her blog, or she'd delete her blog with no warning. Or she'd watch her visitor counter and call people out who were visiting and not leaving comments. She couldn't stand the thought of anyone not liking her... "how is it possible that anyone could have issues with little sweet me?" She would be posessive of certain friends (ie. me), not allowing room for other friends in that friend's life. She would push me away, hide online, not be around to talk, but then blame me for the distance between us.

I finally had to walk away. I can't have friends like that. I need friends who don't play head games. Who always welcome you in their life and their blog, sweetly and gently. Who don't shove you away and then get mad when you leave. I've found a few good friends like that, and I'll keep them.

Once, she'd asked me what had happened to me, to our friendship. I didn't have the heart to tell her. How do you find the words to say that? I see someone else did recently, aparently they were frustrated by the same things I was (I didn't see how they told her, or if it was put nicely or meanly, I only saw her reaction) and boy did they get a very public reaming from her on her blog. She removed it later. I don't know if she felt embarassed by chewing them out so publicly, or if she decided that she was done being mad. I was a little shocked at the angry lashing.

The old friend has found other friends who put up with her "quirky ways" and love her anyway. I'm glad for that. Everyone needs friends. Just sometimes it doesn't work out the way we'd like it to. I'd like all of mine to be fatter than me, but so far I'm the fat girl in the bunch.

11 comments:

Ginabear said...

Jen, I recently came across your ad and I would like to apply for the job as your most loyal friend. I am aware that head games are not in the job description. I will accept you with open arms into my life, my blog and my state of dementia. Please be aware that I stick like glue so if hired, it will be difficult to undo. Please respond at your earliest convenience. I look forward to your response. Sincerely and very lovingly...Me

Jen said...

Can you give me any references? Hahah, just kiddding.
You're HIRED!

Ginabear said...

Thank you for your quick response. I have many references if you need them in the future, however, some numbers maybe have been disconnected due to ignorance on the part of said references! I am look forward to a long lasting relationship and hope to be able to meet your requirements. However, I may have some reservations to the being fat part...what is the policy, can I eat salad everyday or no? And if I punch you in the eye for saying you are fat...would it affect my future employment?? Again, thank you for choosing me. I LOVE YOU JEN!!!!

Kate said...

I see you found someone already . . . drats . . . was going to apply for the position myself . . . and I've even got the fat thing goin' on! ;)
I always wondered what happened between you and "her" . . . and yeah . . . I hear ya . . . friendship needs to go 2 ways . . . or it's not friendship at all . . . :)
Glad you found a friend! Gina rocks! ;)

Jen said...

Well, there are several positions available with this ad.
Besides, Gina's references need to check out first, and she refuses to be fat, hahaha.

Jen said...

Oh and she might get fired if she punches me in the eye.
Gina- you must soak your salad in dressing each and every time... that is policy.

Ginabear said...

ok, I promise not to punch you in the eye but there will be a crusty look flyin your way. I can totally soak my salad, that will not be a problem. Any other requirements? Maybe I should read the manual! Hopefully it reads like oven instructions, lol!!

Kristy said...

Can I apply to be your friend?!

Jen said...

Absolutely! But you have to work on the fat thing, k? hee hee.

Anonymous said...

Hey, I'm already fat.
Do sisters count?

Mara Oakvik said...

Awww man!! So many have already beat me to it :)
Can I be your friend too?